A Reaction To Terror

 (In three parts)
​
Part 1 - the body feels
You see a story,
Appear, a tragedy,
You fear, the worst
Is here. It started with…
But that’s a hard question.
Shock runs through the body
Head tips toes,
Where you are, what you did.
Forever imprinted.
Where were you when it happened?

Las Vegas - breakfast, in the morning
Las Ramblas, Barcelona - out cycling, just connected to internet, briefly, near Crosby
London Bridge - on the sofa, Saturday, then talking in the kitchen. Arguing about armed police with a close friend.
Manchester - Pub, Smithdown road, Liverpool
November 2015, Paris - nightclub, London, friend’s birthday
Je suis Charlie - ski holiday, Switzerland, just come back from slopes
7/7 - school hall, Yorkshire, girl in my year crying, I didn’t know why. Argued with family after watching ‘Hurt Locker’ year later.
9/11 - sitting on floor watching cathode-ray tube TV with mum, she said ‘things are going to change…’
Karrada bombing, Baghdad, Iraq, July 2016 - I wouldn’t be able to tell you.

Tragedies can’t be ranked,
Or emotions evenly split,
Pain bears more weighty,
When preventable,
And the feeling running hasty,
Through body, rush of blood,
I always remember, mostly,
Where I am or was
The day it happened.

Part 2 - The Tragedy Will Be Saved By Your Online Hero
Your online hero will save the day.
Express what you feel in the way
That you like.
Your online hero.
Your columnist
Your tweeter-ranter
Your lived experience victim
Your political outsider with the right words
Your bold statement.
It’s yours, it’s your online hero.

They tell me
Targets are as follows;
UK - France - Germany - Europe - USA
And motivated by;
Islam - Lone wolf - Christian - Far right - Organised terror cell.
But we should;
Not victimise Islamic groups - Give police protection - Increase surveillance - Work with communities - Bring the fight to them - Mourn our losses - Realise it’s all our fault - Not cause so much offense - Acknowledge that nothing’s appropriate - Complain that nothing’s appropriate - be less Western-focused -
Again, repeat;
UK - France - Germany - Europe - USA - Syria - Israel - Iraq - Palestine - Turkey - Turkey again - Syria again - Iran - Afghanistan - Iraq again

Tragedy’s can’t be ranked,
Or emotions evenly split,
Pain bears more weighty,
Pangs the body, and splits,
Your insight, your view,
After all it’s all reduced,
To a few words in a moment,
Pub time, misspoke, causing sobbing,
No space left for resolving,
Containing the world’s problems.
So thank god for our online heroes.

Part 3 - Compartmentalise
It eats you up and spits you out,
You fall as far as fretted knifes,
You splay and yell and hurt,
Alarm, you open 5:33am.

Day drags on dreading death,
Hangs carcasses in corridors,
The last post yells out save me,
And you depart for home.

The sweet embrace of couch and rice,
Feels fake and turns the knife,
Take emotion and fill a bathtub,
And sink,
Compartmentalise.